moments of melancholy
A feeling of pensive sadness, typically with no obvious cause. Melancholy is the mindset in which I shoot all of my images with. This sadness that edges its way into my images is what makes them mine. The personal mindset I take to shooting translates itself into my work. This collection demonstrates that my feelings towards life. Moments of a broken story, all connected through this melancholic feeling.
I collect, sometimes arrange, sometimes stage some, moments of my personal life. The aim is always to keep a souvenir of the moment. With time, the photographic image, by its concrete reality, takes over the abstract mental one, it consumes it. In the end, I find myself trying to recreate a souvenir starting from that photo, rather than including the photograph inside my mental souvenir. Thus, since my mental souvenirs are condemned to dissolve slowly, I search for using moments to soothe that anxiety by poetizing the past.
Isn’t it the sweetest thing, when you get so warm and familiar with somebody’s soul, especially the moment when you realize you’re already telling them things you’ve never said out loud before.
I belong to moments, not to a place, culture, caste, or tribe. But to moments, which numb my nerves and yet make me feel alive.
Happiness, for me, has different meaning in different time. In the current moment, as a student, I prefer to discover new places. It’s not that you only enjoy traveling, but besides that you can learn new things, especially about different cultures and places. I started discovering since I was a student. One of the most amazing places I met in Chittagong was Sea Beach. I get to visit the sea for the first time in my life.
There are a thousand stories that end with forever, and a thousand more that end with an almost. Almost loved. Almost stayed. People always talk about the ones who remain, and the ones with an almost are asked to forget all about it as if it wasn't real. As if it was not love, it was just an escape, a little lie you told yourself, a thing that you will remember as something beautiful, but you are not allowed to feel its pain. When this almost relationship reaches an end, there is no loud shattering, no heavy fights, no one more time, there is no way to even know when exactly it leaves.
Don't let the world tell you that you are not allowed to mourn your own heartbreak, that you are weak for loving people that you shared a deep connection with. Let your heart know that it isn't weak to open up your little heart and love.
Imagine a ruined countryside or imagine a ruined pathway to home, those all things that were there in shape but not now! How does it feel to walk through the passages of Lost time, faded memories, dusk of Memories from childhood. Places that were young, but now it's just an architecture or just geometric shape. How do you see, what do you see when you stare at the places, the moments, the people the pets, who's only living in memory that once belonged to you, there's no one now, no blood no mess just epitaph of time!
How does it feel to walk through the memories after everything, after every trauma after every pity, every fear, every suffering, why do we search our Lost Lanes, Parks, outskirts! How does it feel to walk through the Lost time.
Sometimes illumination comes to our rescue at the very moment when all seems lost; we have knocked every door, and they open on nothing until, at last, we stumble unconsciously against the only one through which we can enter the kingdom we have sought in vain a hundred years…and it opens.
let everything happen to you.
beauty and terror.
just keep going.
no feeling is final.
I tried to find solace in solacy, as opposed to what lunacy brought.
We shared a dance on a certain summer evening on a rooftop in park street, a dance to forget. The other time on Christmas Eve we both meandered around in bow barracks drinking fermented honey and sharing niceties with strangers, the next day they picked me up from sudder street when you were getting your heart broken in the next block. I missed you every time by a few moments, a few hours, a few undone conversations with friends we have both spent nights with, some parties you left early, and some I couldn't attend. Everything happens for a reason, and I found mine to live and love for. I desire to desire. It feels good to be on rooftops on windy nights and not wanting to jump off.
I stare at the streetlights outside
this is when my impractical side speaks up
it screams about the possibility of the
impossible happening
it tires to give me a false sense of hope
it tries its best to convince me
that everything's not damaged beyond repair…
this is when my impractical side speaks up
it screams about the possibility of the
impossible happening
it tires to give me a false sense of hope
it tries its best to convince me
that everything's not damaged beyond repair…
What shall I become
because this is me
I have lived for all
to be totally free
this is how it shall be
till all eternity
because this is me
I have lived for all
to be totally free
this is how it shall be
till all eternity
my eyes and ears
have witnessed the truth
the fact, fiction, and feeling
in life and every book
the winds have calmed
my broken soul
for today, my friends.
have witnessed the truth
the fact, fiction, and feeling
in life and every book
the winds have calmed
my broken soul
for today, my friends.
Till the daybreak and the shadows flee away…
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